Closed Indian mind - does it let you live for yourself? - Part I

My caveat cum recommendation to a cyber-wanderer who may inadvertently stumble upon this space of mine:Before you waste your time and energy and whatever else on this post and curse me for the rest of your life, please take a look at the head-line of my blog.Like I claim in the head-line, I post my insane ramblings on topics close to my heart, with no diplomacy, no polish, just straight from the gut!I don't write for someone else to read, I just write for myself ... simply because I absolutely love to write.This post's heavy on psychology and an extremely lengthy one too.So it's best avoided...

IMHO, Indian youth are a very highly confused lot and are growing increasingly so, thanks to what I will, for now call, factor X. Be it a career choice, a relationship with a member of the opposite sex, fashion trends, religious beliefs or something as simple as the next travel decision, dilemma has become the hallmark of many a young Indian soul.

Discuss a career choice with a 22 year old and this is most likely what you'll hear some 'dudes' and 'dudettes' say: "Well, it was my dream of a lifetime to be an interior designer and start a business of my own. However, my parents’ dream was to MAKE ME (eeeeks! I hate the expression) a doctor; all my friends were keen on being software engineers to make a quick buck; my grandfather just wanted me to stop studying and take over our family’s silk business. I was thoroughly confused and thought it was SAFER to just go with the crowd. So I ended up taking Computer Science Engineering". Whew! An interior design entrepreneur aspirant transforms one of the most major decisions of HIS life overnight, thanks to factor X.

I just happened to overhear some “bahu cribs about saas” episodes in my neighbourhood. I could hear the newly-wed Mrs.Vidya hush-hushing “I love wearing jeans. They are trendy and a lot more comfortable than sarees are. However, my mother-in-law is strictly against it. My husband cannot let me go ahead with it and disappoint his mother”. Her co-sister Meena chipped in “I understand, Vidya. Iam an atheist and have never visited a temple for as long as I can remember. Things have changed drastically after I’ve started living here though. I now have to spend atleast half an hour every morning performing what I personally believe are meaningless rituals. I even have to visit the temple every evening, no matter what I think about it”. Factor X at work again.

Another snippet from college where I heard my 24-year old classmate doing some sob-talk: “Both of us have been in love for the past 3 years. Iam more sure of this girl than I have been of myself over all these years. My parents find her reasonably good too. However, both our parents are against our marriage coz society’ll shun them if they consent to an inter-caste marriage. So I had to give up on her”. There’s factor X raising its ugly head. His friend, on the other hand, wails for a different reason “Iam used to a very simple lifestyle. Huge malls, clubs, parties, wine, discussing women, blowing money on golf, infact anything remotely aristocratic, is not to my liking at all. However, if I just stick to my interests of Indian Classical music, philosophical books, coding competitions, cricket and the like, I shall be reduced to a companionless nerd n people around me will scream “Go get a life you sucker!” So I’d rather tune myself to live their lifestyles than live the way I want to”.

...Continued in Part II